Self-criticism is not completely bad.
It helps us keep ourselves accountable, analyze our mistakes, and perform better the next time.
However, the problem arrives when your self-criticism starts going out of the limit and reaches the level of toxicity where you criticize yourself for literally everything.
Do you want to stop criticizing yourself but do not know how?
Stop worrying because today, I’m going to how to stop criticizing yourself.
Table of contents
1. Confine your self-criticism to text
Here’s a simple question.
How do you criticize yourself? In your thoughts, right?
Well, everyone does the same.
However, the problem with thoughts is that they are so much fast.
You can sit down for a moment, and you’ll have hundreds if not thousands of thoughts storming your mind.
According to the National Science Foundation, humans get more than 60,000 thoughts every day.
Now imagine having this huge number of self-criticizing thoughts in your mind.
It will have a terrible impact on your mental and emotional health.
Therefore, you need to confine your self-criticism to text only.
Whenever you feel like you are about to criticize yourself, just take out the notepad and start writing whatever is in your mind.
Doing this will have two huge benefits:
1. Your thoughts will slow down
You cannot write as fast as you think.
It’s common sense, right?
Let’s suppose you had 50 self-criticism thoughts in your mind, but you only managed to write 10 of them and forgot 40 of them.
This way, you will reduce/slow down your self-critical thoughts and feel a LOT BETTER.
2. You can analyze your thoughts
When you are thinking inside your head, even the most irrational thoughts seem real and convincing to you.
However, when you write them on paper, you get the chance to analyze them.
Then you realize that this thing is actually irrelevant, illogical, and irrational.
This way, you can filter many of your self-critical thoughts and feel so good.
2. Keep yourself busy
Another easy way to stop criticizing yourself is to keep yourself busy.
When you are sitting idle doing absolutely nothing, your brain will automatically start storming itself with many negative thoughts.
To avoid this: the solution is to keep yourself busy, active, and engaged in other things.
Whenever you feel that the negative thoughts are entering your mind, just get up and do something:
- You can play a video game
- Watch YouTube
- Talk to a friend
- Go for a walk
- Do some exercise
- Read a book
- Start cooking something, etc.
In short, there are tons of other things that you can do.
3. Ask yourself for evidence
Keep in mind that not everything your brain tells you is correct.
Most of the time, the thoughts coming into your mind are biased, irrational, and false.
However, your mind just keeps forcing you to assume that they are true while they are not.
Whenever you feel like you are toxically criticizing yourself, then ask yourself for evidence.
If you are thinking that, “I am going to embarrass myself during the meeting with your boss tomorrow,” stop immediately.
Ask your brain that what kind of evidence do you have to prove it?
Quickly make a list of all the evidence that suggests you will embarrass yourself.
Then make another list of all the evidence that suggests you will not embarrass yourself.
Compare both of them, and you will see which opinion is rational and close to reality.
This way, you can debunk all the fake self-criticizing thoughts in your mind.
4. Think out of the box
Most of the time, the thing we fear the most isn’t even as bad as we think.
All you need to do is think out of the box.
For instance, your mind is constantly criticizing you that you are below average and you are going to fail the job interview.
Ask it straight away that, “okay, I may fail the job interview, then what?”
It is not the end of the world, and it is completely normal to fail a job interview.
You can simply learn from your failure and apply again and again and again unless you finally succeed and achieve your dream.
Life is so big, and if one door closes, another opens. It is AS SIMPLE AS THAT!
This approach will help you think rationally and get rid of those useless self-criticizing thoughts you get all the time.
5. What would you advise a friend?
One simple way to get rid of those ridiculous self-criticizing thoughts is to see things from another person’s view.
Suppose a friend was in a similar situation, so what would you advise them to get out of it?
Would you call them an idiot?
Would you hurl abuses and toxic criticism towards them? No! you won’t do that.
Instead, you would calm them down and tell them to think rationally and positively.
Now do the same with yourself and get yourself out of the situation.